Macaulay Culkin he is not

"Haley Joel Osment, the child actor who mesmerized audiences in "The Sixth Sense," was hospitalized this morning after the car he was driving flipped over in La Canada Flintridge, according to the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department.

Osment, 18, apparently lost control of his 1995 Saturn and hit a brick pillar with a mailbox on Flintridge Avenue, just east of Chevy Chase Drive about 2:10 a.m., a department spokesman said. The car flipped over on its roof, and came to rest a short distance away.

Osment was taken to Huntington Memorial Hospital in Pasadena. The injuries were not regarded as life threatening, the spokesman said.”


I found a few things funny and refreshing about that snippet. First of all, when the fuck did Haley Joel Osmant turn 18? Wasn’t he like 4 in “The Sixth Sense”?

Second of all, he drives a ’95 Saturn? What a practical kid. I’m sure he gets the oil changed on a regular basis and always gets his card punched at the car wash so that he can redeem that free 11th wash. Seriously, a Saturn?

Lastly, there was no mention of alcohol and/or drug use contributing to the accident. He’s 18. That’s like 53 in movie star years. How the fuck was he not in a drunken stupor or strung out on oxycodone? C’mon kid, this is Hollywood!

Next you’re going to tell me that he graduated from high school…